Tuesday, January 29, 2008

i was hurt by the demeaning words. The words that ive never received for the past year. I thought things turned out great and fab but i was wrong. No one really understands me. Thinking differently leads to a separate way, broken heart, rolling tears.

I felt like a clown. A fool to many. As always.

I felt so small and insignifant to many, with no real talent inbuilt within me.

The candle that always lit me up is being blown away, leaving me in the dim darkest corner ever.

I could no longer find smiles and happiness in my life. I dont know what is the real happiness in life. Is money really everything? Is love everything? and tell me, what is everything that you could hold on for life?

Not even your beautiful youth.

Appearing naive to many, paranoid to many, full of complaints to many. Living in this world arent beautiful as what i thought. Life is a dread. Full of worries, woes and sadness.

Sometimes Im a waste of resources. Not sometimes, ALWAYS.

Im incapable of anything.

Monday, January 28, 2008

updates!


Helloooo!! long time since ive updated!

Im feeling so nauseous mannn.. and ive puked out the chicken wings, milk tea, peanut butter toast that i had with huihong and her love. Whenever i see her, i must buy things or else i will feel damn itchy and add on, if she buys anything, im more tempted to buy too!! bad influence!!!!!! peer pressure and peer influence! haha BAD MAMA HONG.

I wanted to play tennis with them toooo =( but due to working hours constraint..

my nini making noise again because i dont update my blog and im always sleeping late and he'd hear whining bout my complexion from me then he will start " you always say you wanted to sleep before 11pm and then becomes 1am etcc... blaahhhh " and when i got craving for chicken wings or any junk food, he will not stop me and if i grumble bout myself being or getting fat, he will start saying "who ask you to keep eating and if i stop you from eating you will get unhappy" hahaha im hard to please.. i know.

A month back,


motor car show again..


Malaysian racing queen... abit erm.. hahaha u know what i mean uhhh


I dont know what car is that.. some malaysian car


This is so not realistic hahh...why would a normal driver place their screens in the boot???!?!








Hunney trying to race..and he lost... booohhooo it wasnt easy thoughh not as easy as the ones in arcade-daytona =D


I love suzuki lapin (rabbit in french) its a small puny vintage car


Lousy poser i am! poooffff



Lapin's interior..

Oh yes! Went to watch Maria Sharapova tennis game. Somehow Hun got it for free from camp and weeee heee exciting match with... i cant rem the opponent's name hah





Poor ball pickers, they got to squat throughout the match haha ..







Needless to say, Sharapova won! Yay thats what i wanted.

I need to sleep now and will update moreeeee... feeling nauseous/// urrrggghhh hope i can sleep well! nice meeting up with you hong mama !!

I miss my hunn..... you busy OLD MAN.

Friday, January 18, 2008

hun is angry

im sad... =(


no one loves me..


im an unwanted child =( boooohoooo

Monday, January 14, 2008

lady luck be with me!

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aiyerrr!!!! my heart is beating damn fast and i bet i cant sleep well tonight! Sighhh everyone is asking me man.. and there is a very minimal chance anyway. I want to talk to someone to ease of my anxiety!!

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aiyerrrrrrrrrrr x100000000000000000000000000000


i dont want to go back office, i dont want to do audit, i dont like the cranky sam pat weirdos.

Im sooooooo HAPPY!!!

Ive got a new toy named LUCKY!
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haha oh my god.. i see this bear with the stupid brief i wana laugh out real loud! my hunney went to BUILD - A - BEAR to "create" this bear for me.. and he was describing the process that keeps me laughing till now.

imagine he has to pump the cotton in...with the command of the sales personnel over there lol.. pick a heart n make a wish and then he has to kiss the heart before stuffin into the bear's backside.

So cute lah especially with the sexy brief okay! So MAN!

oh yea, month back i bought mont blanc key pouch holder for my hun~~~weeettttt .. not that im rich ok! im seriously broke... self declare bankrupt!

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nini looks so suave to drive the SLK convertible woooossshhh

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so blessed to sit in there!! and i brought my potato along for a spin!

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Not rent oneeeeeeee okayyyyyy lol..

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craving for apple pie~~~

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yes, indeed i love teddy bears more than hello kitties. byebye kitty bitches haha

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BK BREAKFAST!! talk about breakfast simply makes me pissed... poooffff you know and i know.. haha. you'll always feel so good to have nice breakfast man.
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my happy pea =*)

he bought me donuts too!!
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in return, i gave him this! hahaa

thanks hunney for everything you've done for me all these while.. im sincerely moved by your efforts, your care and everything. Skipping classes to build that bear, bought donuts is definitely worthwhile!!! hahaha because im a gem! one sam pat woman. Pardon my crankiness at times okay love?!!! Sorry for not updating so often and im so fan naooo over work issues etc.. hope you understand and thanks for being there with me!


Huihong mama, lets go eat liu lian with my nini and your love together ok!!!

Friday, January 11, 2008

sad girl

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Hehh cheesy baked rice for you hunney!

Sorry for not updating my blog because my blog needs pictures and im waiting for you to send me!!! I dont like wordy blog as my language is not pow-der-ful and the pictures says it all!

This week had been a hectic week for my sweet hun and only managed to meet him like once... even though for that short while, you made me gained like 300 calories or even more??? hahha.
I hope you'll have enough rest!

I was assigned to do quite a "number" of statutory audits and i wana throw the whole pile of things at her. There was no communication between them. Its really fucked up and annoying when there is no communication, things get messy and everything is so unorganised. For the whole fucking week all i received was scolding from the corporate secretary side. HELLO, im doing what i was instructed to do and im just following my orders!!! You have no right to scold me like i killed your whole family. You dont need to give me the super duper black face like i owed you money. Im so pissed and i dont wish to be always being cursed by some people whom i dont know either through the phone or right infront of me. Im carrying out my task too not only you corp secs are busy. When you assigned things for us to do and to be efficient and effective, please ensure that things done are not double work, double effort. If you are so free to surf your bloody forum then do the stat review yourself! All you know is behave like a dog, sticking your tongue out and wagging your tail infront of your... i wont say its owner but someone whom can back you on. If you think you can finish everything within this week, why not you try doing it yourself? Im just so unwilling to do things for you. Although im paid to do such shit jobs at such a low level, i shouldnt be complaining but i still felt that i dont deserve the scoldings for a week and you are not doing your job properly and to think you still expect people to respect you and follow your orders?

Okays, im feeling very fed up and lost. I do not know what i want in my career. Im too lost to do anything right now, right this moment. Why am i not loving my current job? What makes me feel so dreaded and so sad to go work everyday? Im like a walking corpse feeling so deadly in office. I dont feel the drive or motivation to apply what ive learnt for the 20 years of my education. Everyday i'll received a call from this kang tao senior... asking me bout the client stuff etc.. how the fucking hell i know! I know nuts bout this company background, i emailed the client and if they dont revert back to me isit my business? You are calling me everyday.. even the whole dept knows you are looking for me. Whats so important that you cant wait? The job is not even next week for god sake.

im venting my anger.

POOFFFFF boiling blood!

I received email and call from SIA for the final interview and im wondering how isit like. Met my mom in the noon for some cny shopping and she bought everything in a day! Shopping with my mom was great.. not that she paid for me its just... i did accompany her and make her day! Bumped into this girl who was in the same grp as me during the previous interview. She and me was the only survivor in the grp for the interviews. She had her final interview on tues and she told me that she didnt make it to the final and taadaa there goes her dream. Its really not easy or i should say its very tough to enter SIA to be their trademark SINGAPORE GIRL. So i supposed, i cant make it through either. I shall stop pinning hopes on it and might as well use this time to think of what i should do other than audit.

ENOUGH OF CAREER ETC. puiiiiiii

Anyhooos, i bought new heels from pazzion and uber cheap dress with diamante. Far east plaza clothes are seriously over priced! I rather get from miss selfridge, zara or topshop even though topshop ones are abit overpriced too. Far east outlets offer lousy quality clothes that are all from bkk and even if its of silk, its too highly over... I hate charles and keith.. they are so popular for cheap shoes to the extend that whatever design i want for my size, its out of stock. But pazzion shoes are really nice.. esp their flats and pumps.

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cute toy poodle yeaa??

im discussing with hunn if we should buy a dog... hurrr.. i have to consider seriously as its a life involved, the commitment, the responsibilities. I dont want to purchase it in a moment of cuteness of the dog and moment of folly. I dont wish to abandon it. My rabbit under the care of some other rabbit care takers told me that my rabbit passed away. so sad. died of kidney failure.... T_T. was it my fault? ..... dont know... i didnt anyhow feed my rabbit previously. . they said that its most likely due to the breeding of the rabbit so its the breeder fault .. its the pet shop's fault..for selling me a "problem" rabbit and caused me to feel so guilty. Sigh karma man!

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This is my trademark....I want to be a happy girl with no woes and worries!

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Lastly, I PhotobucketYou Hunney...

I need to tell you something.
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Friday, January 4, 2008

updates and updates!

Helllooo!
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Few weeks back, Tong Shui was hunney's favourite spot for tea session.
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Eight treasures tea and Lemon Honey

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heh heh

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Being bored!

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I had shanghai ma la noodle

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a tantrum kid.

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Baked rice

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cheesy melted wings

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Drove around town to enjoy the christmas lightings!!!

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It had been 4 years back since I last ate GIRL GUIDES COOKIES. Im a girl guider okayz!
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Bought for my pretty pretty =)

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I noticed his fat tummy =x

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He is trying very hard to make HAPPY pose like a dog.

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OH MY GOD! This is so UNGLAM of my ah pui! boxers with army socks HAHA its sooo.... suku ..BURBERRY BOXERS SOMEMORE OKAY!!~~-_-"

NiNinininini brought me to VITTLES over at Sembawang. They serve quality food with considerable cheap price.
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Beef stick salad

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Turkey soup

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Chicken something something hoho i cannot remember what isit called.

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Tenderloin for bel bel!

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Filling carrot cake

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Father and son =) sooooooo cute!

Hurrrr I wanna eat PhotobucketPhotobucketPhotobucket... especially gelare waffles with 2 chocolatey flavours of ice cream, i wana try mcflurry mudpie! It seems very chocolatey enough for me~~~I need it to calm my nerves, to soothe my feelings and excitement hohoo... school starting, results gona be out reallll soon!

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Stupid MAY MAY AND MY COUSIN BO. Such an "ANCESTORS" wedding photo.

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my Nini loves this baggg though its for ladies! I cannot imagine my aunty can actually spend $1000 odd to buy one uber small chanel sling bag. MADNESS.

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I have more things to blog!!!! Maria sharapova tennis game in singapore, motorcar show ... etcc... PICTURES PICTURES PICTURES AHPUI!

May all the good things stay by my side... i know its abit impossible that they stay by my side forever, i'll try my best to keep it as long as i can. But! There are always miracles and who knows, good things stay by your side forever? My tummy kept rumbling... craving for ice cream!

Work has been ultra shitty! The thought of me going out with shitty people really make me dread from work. The shitty people whom only care for themselves, if their budgets will be burst, trying to push as much job to the juniors. Well, thats the life of a junior i supposed. There's this shitty someone reduced my statutory audit from 2 hours to 1 hour. HELLOOOOOO, even though im confident to say that im able to complete it in 1 hour, im still very unhappy with you for reducing the time Im supposed to be given. Trying to eat up my 1 hour in replace of your task? EEEKssss disgusting! PUI X1000000000000

there's this guiding star leading me the way to heaven. THANK YOU. FREE ME FROM SUCH SHITTY PEOPLE AND MISERY!

Happy 2008 people!
Count down at marina with hunney and his colleagues! The fireworks was awesome! My new year resolution would be... HMMMM hmmmm HMMMM.. haha, you know and i know.


Thank you love, for being so patient with me recently despite my crankiness and the never ending support from you and encouraged me. Finally you passed your test. hah!

Im gona learn drivingggggggggg SOON SOON. haha. I LOVE SUZUKI LAPIN.